From "Life on Mars:"

July 6, 2006

Since I found it through that same Google hit I mentioned earlier, here’s one of my favorite bits from one of my favorite West Wing scripts.

Are you eating a salad?



‘Cause I am.

I don’t think I’ve ever seen you eat a salad. What kind of salad is it?

I don’t know.

Just mixed greens?

I don’t know what kind of salad it is. I’m eating a salad, okay? I’m doing it. Do I have to know the names? There’s no difference between them. It’s a bowl of weeds. Some of them have cheese. This isn’t the kind with cheese. Does that answer your question? How many years have you guys been “Toby, you eat like a teenager. Toby, that’s red meat. That’s your second cigar.” Here I am eating a salad, which by the way, you could cover this thing in barbecue sauce and it still tastes like the ground, and I’m getting heckled from the gallery, who wanted to come in here to eat his roast beef sandwich with ketchup on a kaiser roll and watch the damn tennis on my TV! That’s all I’m saying.



  1. Oh, god, I’m a West Wing geek. I think I can place that episode.My brain truly is random. I love West Wing. Hello new show(whatever it’s called). I’ll actually be able to watch it.

  2. That episode, “Life on Mars,” in one of the last of Sorkin’s, and the second episode with Matthew Perry. It’s the one where VP Hoynes resigns.

    The new show, Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip has a stellar cast, and I’m keeping my fingers crossed that it’s something special. I’m not quite sure what to expect from it week by week, though.

  3. Ah shit. I never watched it when it aired, but now I’m catching up with the DVDs. Hoynes is still VP in my world.

    I’m abandoning this thread before the rest of my world comes crashing down.

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